I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Randomize