Texts From Last Night

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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  My brain says no but my pants say off.

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  (902): My brain says no but my pants say off. http://tfl.nu/syce
  Replies (7) Good night (5165) Bad night (793)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.

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  (425): Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts. http://tfl.nu/1fhj
  Replies (112) Good night (1514) Bad night (4451)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends

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  (814): Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends http://tfl.nu/5yet
  Replies (77) Good night (7566) Bad night (1278)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.

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  (813): y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all. http://tfl.nu/2iln
  Replies (125) Good night (15271) Bad night (1428)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.

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  (248): Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace. http://tfl.nu/fcle
  Replies (20) Good night (10725) Bad night (1318)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.

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  (513): I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle. http://tfl.nu/7tfd
  Replies (15) Good night (4054) Bad night (879)
• Favorite

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.

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  (318): I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away. http://tfl.nu/8l4v
  Replies (21) Good night (1461) Bad night (5563)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk

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  (585): there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk http://tfl.nu/9sjy
  Replies (21) Good night (1614) Bad night (3924)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time

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  (717): just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time http://tfl.nu/oodw
  Replies (4) Good night (1901) Bad night (639)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.

  (845): View more from New York

  I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?

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  (914): And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken. (845): I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa? http://tfl.nu/09c4
  Replies (3) Good night (1037) Bad night (381)
• Favorite

  (956): View more from Texas

  I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.

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  (956): I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied. http://tfl.nu/aspz
  Replies (2) Good night (590) Bad night (450)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.

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  (859): This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her. http://tfl.nu/8e8b
  Replies (6) Good night (597) Bad night (359)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.

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  (508): Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER. http://tfl.nu/dcuo
  Replies (0) Good night (290) Bad night (424)
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers

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  (605): Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers http://tfl.nu/23r1
  Replies (0) Good night (445) Bad night (492)
• Favorite

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo

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  (952): My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo http://tfl.nu/hnma
  Replies (0) Good night (408) Bad night (196)

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