Texts From Last Night

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  (407): View more from Florida

  me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.

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  (407): me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun. http://tfl.nu/sy2c
  Replies (41) Good night (4286) Bad night (1308)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock

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  (410): hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock http://tfl.nu/0euc
  Replies (26) Good night (1512) Bad night (4396)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer

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  (703): Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer http://tfl.nu/3upq
  Replies (42) Good night (3713) Bad night (1049)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win

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  (609): Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win http://tfl.nu/6ut9
  Replies (43) Good night (714) Bad night (4073)
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  (518): View more from New York

  i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting

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  (518): i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting http://tfl.nu/x71w
  Replies (13) Good night (2873) Bad night (2948)
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  (903): View more from Texas

  I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.

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  (903): I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk. http://tfl.nu/07kh
  Replies (7) Good night (1234) Bad night (3408)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....

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  (919): Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends.... http://tfl.nu/5sph
  Replies (7) Good night (2089) Bad night (2336)
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  (574): View more from Indiana

  im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven

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  (574): im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven http://tfl.nu/dx1t
  Replies (6) Good night (4201) Bad night (881)
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  (518): View more from New York

  My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.

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  (518): My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday. http://tfl.nu/tcvi
  Replies (5) Good night (1773) Bad night (576)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back

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  (301): people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back http://tfl.nu/aa8w
  Replies (3) Good night (686) Bad night (1238)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.

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  (406): Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me. http://tfl.nu/igpq
  Replies (5) Good night (756) Bad night (488)
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  (716): View more from New York

  It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!

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  (716): It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT! http://tfl.nu/5pm7
  Replies (1) Good night (482) Bad night (955)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.

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  (785): There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha. http://tfl.nu/kiqc
  Replies (1) Good night (524) Bad night (299)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash

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  (847): Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash http://tfl.nu/hj9z
  Replies (1) Good night (562) Bad night (338)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi

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  (410): You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi http://tfl.nu/fnbe
  Replies (0) Good night (587) Bad night (391)

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