I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
