the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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