She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
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