I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
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