I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
