I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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