I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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