were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Randomize