u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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