needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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