Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
what day is it and did you see me today?
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
