My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
