You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Randomize