Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
