we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
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Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
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She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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