Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix