i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
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