so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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