He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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