He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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