i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
