He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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