On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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