How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize