Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
handjob tips. give me some.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Randomize