is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
you didnt know i had herpes?
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
