Soap is not a condiment
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
