i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Who did Billy Mays play for?
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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