The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
