we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Randomize
