Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
it glows. i had to have it.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
