I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
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