Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
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