Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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