I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
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