theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
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