he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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