Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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