Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize