i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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