I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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