Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
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