he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
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