I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
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