So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
