i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
