"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Randomize
