I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize